It's always so damn to start these things!
'Invisible and indivisible, your light is ultraviolet'
There we go that broke the tension, I love that song :)
Guilt. Does everyone have it ? And should we? I want someone to tell me what's right, but more I think secretly I want someone to tell me to do what I want instead of what I should if you see what I mean...
What makes you want the things you can't have ? For example I have a lovely boyfriend. His name is Christian (like the lion :) ) and it's been over a year now. I'm happy, most of the time . And when I'm not I don't know why. I blame him for things that aren't his fault and do things just to upset him. I find myself lusting for guys that aren't nearly in the same league as him. I'm so lucky to have him, because he could do so much better, I know I'd be hard pressed to find anyone as good looking and clever and good natured and compatible as he is and yet I sit in college flirting with Steven constantly. I drool over my climbing partner Alec constantly and then I distance myself from Christian.
There's something so wrong with me and I can't tell him. I hate myself for how I treat him, And every time like a loyal dog he comes back and begs for MY forgiveness!
The worst part is I think if I got the opportunity, I would probably cheat and I don't think I'd even feel guilty about it... I pray this ends I don't want to loose him, or at least I don't think I do.
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